I've been running into one particular misunderstanding a lot. I'm going to write out what I think is the antidote as a bulletpointed list.

-The fact that you're being abused doesn't keep you from being abusive.

-The fact that other people exercise unfair power over you actually makes it more likely that there's someone you're exercising unfair power over.

-Being aware that this is a thing can help with not perpetuating it.

-Asserting "you're not being abused! What's happening to me is way worse!" is the opposite of helpful.

-Often, it makes the other person feel like they have to challenge the importance of your abuse to prove that what's happening to them is worth bringing up or caring about.

-A lot of people who are being abused and exploited in different ways antagonize each other with this kind of misdirected anger.

-We need to acknowledge that people whose struggles are different from ours have valid struggles, and face real injustices, without letting the conversation turn into a false dichotomy where abuse against a particular group is the only abuse worth talking about.

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